... in His hands, He's got the whole world in His hands.
Reminded of the truth in this simple kids' song. And specifically for me, at this point it time, the reminder that He has Collin in His hands.
Here's the thing. It has been a week and a half on Neocate and Collin is still vomiting. The Neocate has been great clearing up some symptoms that were due to allergies - diarrhea, eczema, eye puffiness, and skin irritation are GONE (Praising the Lord for that!) But the vomiting remains.
Now, it could just be as simple as letting his esophagus heal from all the weeks of constant vomiting. It could be ulcerations, or this crazy thing called pyloric stenosis, or something entirely different. None of us know. We're all guessing. But to aid us in the process of figuring out how to best help him, Collin has been scheduled with the pediatric gastroenterologist a week from today (Thursday the 31st). They'll do some unpleasant tests and scopes, I'm sure, and hopefully figure out why Little Buddy can't hold his food down. It could be reflux, but not likely, as he seems to hold the food in his belly for hours after (instead of digesting it ) and then continue to vomit until it has been emptied. He is only eating approximately 20 ounces a day, and since he is not on solids yet (waiting to figure out the puking thing/allergy issues), he should be consuming 28-32. So, he's not overfeeding.
I can hardly let my mind think about all the options of things it might be., and I'm notorious for jumping to the worst-case scenario just to prepare myself for bad news that may or may not come. I can't think about the possibility of my little man having surgery at 6 months old, even though I know many babies have to for various reasons even younger than Collin. I just hate picturing him hooked up to tubes and monitors and IVs, etc. I don't want to think about sedation. I don't want to have another hospital stay with my baby.
And yet...
I know that whatever happens is not a surprise to God. I know that Collin was created and knit together by an all-knowing, all-powerful, ever-present Creator. He alone knows the inner-workings of my little buddy. I know He is capable of healing Collin - with or without the use of doctors, modern medicine, and surgery. And that is what we are praying for. Healing. Supernaturally or through a doctor, either way is fine with me. I just want my little boy to eat and hold it down and grow big & strong. I will deal with the issue of food allergies one step at a time. I just want him to eat and not throw up.
So I'm kneeling again before our Maker, laying my son at His feet, and surrendering control. Again. So if we are on your hearts this week, please pray with us for healing. Thanks!
2 comments:
I will definitely be praying for you and little Collin, Courtney! Luke threw up a lot, too...he would eat and throw it all back up. It was terrible. I, too, scoured the Internet and was worried he would need surgery. Thankfully, he did not. I still don't know what it was that made him throw up so much--all he was eating was Gerber's baby food fruits and veggies. So, I know what you are going through and will keep you in my prayers. I'll be eager to hear how your appt goes!
Praying that you find answers and healing soon. You feel so helpless when your babies don't feel well and you can't fix it. But you are right, find comfort in knowing that it is in His hands and He will give you the strength to make it through. Keep us posted.
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